Hey Rusty,
Good story. For the original, read W.Somerset Maugham's "The Verger".
Bob Eaton
Rusty Carruth wrote:
>
> Subject: [silly???] Microsoft & your career
> Organization: Dis-organized?
>
> Ok, look, I know its not exactly right down there at the end, but
> its cute anyway.
>
> > >>>>> Thus spake Ed Coleman <coleman@tempe.tt.slb.com>
> >
> > > An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a
> janitor.
> > > The manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test
> (Section:
> > > Floors, sweeping and cleaning).
> > > After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed at
> minimum
> > > wage,$5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I
> can send
> > > you a form to complete and tell you where to report for work on
> your
> > > first day."
> > > Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor
> an
> > > e-mail address. To this the MS manager replies, "Well, then, that
> means
> > > that you virtually don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to
> be
> > > employed."
> > > Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having
> only $10
> > > in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 pound flat of tomatoes at
> the
> > > supermarket. Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes
> > > individually at 100% profit.
> > > Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up
> with
> > > almost $100 before going to sleep that night. And thus it dawns
> on him
> > > that he could quite easily make a living selling tomatoes.
> Getting up
> > > early every day and going to bed late, he multiplies his profits
> > > quickly.
> > > After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several dozen
> boxes
> > > of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again so that he can buy
> a
> > > pick-up truck to support his expanding business. By the end of
> the
> > > second year, he is the owner of a fleet of pick-up trucks and
> manages a
> > > staff of a hundred formerly unemployed people, all selling
> tomatoes.
> > > Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to
> buy some
> > > life insurance. Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an
> > > insurance plan to fit his new circumstances. At the end of the
> telephone
> > > conversation, the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in
> order to
> > > send the final documents electronically.
> > > When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is
> stunned,
> > > "What, you don't have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to
> amass
> > > such wealth without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just
> imagine
> > > where you would be now, if you had been connected to the internet
> from
> > > the very start!"
> > > After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, "Why,
> of
> > > course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"
> > >
> > > Moral of this story:
> > > 1. The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your
> life.
> > > 2. If you don't have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become
> a
> > > millionaire.
> > > 3. Seeing that you got this story via e-mail, you're probably
> closer to
> > > becoming a janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.
> > > 4. If you do have a computer and e-mail, you have already been
> taken to
> > > the cleaners by Microsoft.
> >
> > << End forwarded message
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Subject: Returned mail: Cannot send message within 5 days
> Date: Wed, 4 Apr 2001 09:46:22 -0700 (MST)
> From: Mail Delivery Subsystem <MAILER-DAEMON@tempe.tt.slb.com>
> To: <rustyc@descomp.com>
>
> The original message was received at Fri, 30 Mar 2001 09:38:52 -0700 (MST)
> from tempe-dhcp7 [163.185.94.92]
>
> ----- The following addresses had permanent fatal errors -----
> <n7okn@qso.com>
>
> ----- Transcript of session follows -----
> <n7okn@qso.com>... Deferred: Connection timed out with mail.qso.com.
> Message could not be delivered for 5 days
> Message will be deleted from queue
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Reporting-MTA: dns; azterra.tempe.tt.slb.com.
> Arrival-Date: Fri, 30 Mar 2001 09:38:52 -0700 (MST)
>
> Final-Recipient: RFC822; n7okn@qso.com
> Action: failed
> Status: 4.4.7
> Remote-MTA: DNS; mail.qso.com
> Last-Attempt-Date: Wed, 4 Apr 2001 09:46:22 -0700 (MST)
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Subject: [silly???] Microsoft & your career
> Date: Fri, 30 Mar 2001 09:19:21 -0700
> From: Rusty Carruth <rustyc@descomp.com>
> Organization: Dis-organized?
> To: rustyc carruth <rustyc@descomp.com>
>
> > >>>>> Thus spake Ed Coleman <coleman@tempe.tt.slb.com>
> >
> > > An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor.
> > > The manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test (Section:
> > > Floors, sweeping and cleaning).
> > > After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed at minimum
> > > wage,$5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I can send
> > > you a form to complete and tell you where to report for work on your
> > > first day."
> > > Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor an
> > > e-mail address. To this the MS manager replies, "Well, then, that means
> > > that you virtually don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be
> > > employed."
> > > Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having only $10
> > > in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 pound flat of tomatoes at the
> > > supermarket. Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes
> > > individually at 100% profit.
> > > Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with
> > > almost $100 before going to sleep that night. And thus it dawns on him
> > > that he could quite easily make a living selling tomatoes. Getting up
> > > early every day and going to bed late, he multiplies his profits
> > > quickly.
> > > After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several dozen boxes
> > > of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again so that he can buy a
> > > pick-up truck to support his expanding business. By the end of the
> > > second year, he is the owner of a fleet of pick-up trucks and manages a
> > > staff of a hundred formerly unemployed people, all selling tomatoes.
> > > Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to buy some
> > > life insurance. Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an
> > > insurance plan to fit his new circumstances. At the end of the telephone
> > > conversation, the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order to
> > > send the final documents electronically.
> > > When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is stunned,
> > > "What, you don't have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to amass
> > > such wealth without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine
> > > where you would be now, if you had been connected to the internet from
> > > the very start!"
> > > After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, "Why, of
> > > course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"
> > >
> > > Moral of this story:
> > > 1. The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your life.
> > > 2. If you don't have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become a
> > > millionaire.
> > > 3. Seeing that you got this story via e-mail, you're probably closer to
> > > becoming a janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.
> > > 4. If you do have a computer and e-mail, you have already been taken to
> > > the cleaners by Microsoft.
> >
> > << End forwarded message
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